~moody

UM actuarial science...supposed to be my dream and my hope.being so hard to realise my dream since i got to know what is actuarial science during upper high school.somehow i was only known to the term 'actuarial science' yet i do not know what am i looking for in this field.recalled days before i entered university,i used to ask my pals about their interests and choices of courses in tertiary education.and willingly,everyone would like to share.but most of their response would be i-am-not-sure or i-havent decided.hmm...i thought i was well-planned for my tertiary studies,and finally i got what i desire.still-UM actuarial science.been through matriculation which everyone saying it is as easy as ABC.well,we shouldn recognise it in that way unless it is compared to STPM.so,everything seems progressing very smoothly(too smooth,or i should say slippery?).i had lots of fun and experiences during my matric life in the less-than-1year time.however, in UM,i find it hard to feel the same happiness.what's going on with me?i haven adapted after 6months there.i cant wait to go home every weekend although i am not that kind of mummy's gal.but why?
well,first sem was already a history for me.and i had ended it up with a horrible,terrible and disappointing result.i am extremely disappointed to myself.i have billions of excuses to my own failure but not even a single reason.i was advised to study harder,learn from mistakes....bla bla bla.yeah,i will..but i am wondering what's my problem anyway.is it stress?if so,where it is from?parents?friends?coursemates?lecturers?or even myself ?! or i just overestimated myself?
it is a tough nut to crack. and i am going to relax myself.yeah..i did.i did enjoy 1week trip with friends.2 trips in a week,fun.and finally i was inspired implicitly.
nothing is easy but we can make it simple.how?figure it out on yourself.
suddenly recalled a quote: Nobody is perfect.I am nobody. it is a sentence printed on a t-shirt.aha,who dares to wear it and walking around?i would salute to him/her.
erhmm...risk is our game?yeah,it is inevitable to deal(play?) with risks.no matter high risk or low risk.so we should master risk and not mastered by risk.
yea..motivate ourselves...never give up!! enjoy every single second come what may...

cheers
~aimay